I Wonder Sometimes...

Okay this is going to be a weird one I think. It's a bit of a reflection of where I am at today.

In about about five months I will hit one of the milestone birthdays. Often when I hit one of these I look back and reflect on things accomplished, opportunities missed and goals yet to be attained. This doesn't necessarily mean some huge thing that I need to accomplish. It may just be something that I need to do to make my life easier.

So today healthwise I have issues. I think many of them are the result of leading a rather sedentary lifestyle in my 30s and 40s. It sure didn't help that I smoked for thirty years. My goodness that is a long time to have such a terrible habit. Glad that I stopped a year and a half ago. My goal between now and year-end is to try to develop some positive trends in my lifestyle. Eat better. Exercise. See a doctor about a couple of things.

Workwise I need to manage my time better. I tend to lose focus and run from one thing to another. I have to prioritize better.

Financially I have to face up to some poor choices I made. I have to right the ship somewhat. I have to remember to spend what I have now and not spend what I will have tomorrow. Pretty much means live within the boundaries of the salary that I bring in. After all I have to set an example in this regard for Harrison to at least see. There will be a financial crunch in the next couple of years. He needs a car and he is going to need more money for Clemson. The free ride at Tech is about to end.

As for myself and my psychological or spiritual well-being. I want to better myself. I want to feel and know that deep within that I am who I am. That the person that I show to the outside world is a person that is beyond reproach. A man of character. A person that has nothing, absolutely nothing to hide to anyone. A person who can be counted on but not a person that is gullible or naive or can be taken advantage of by others. I have to be able to look in the mirror on a daily basis and know that on this day, that day, that future day that I did the right thing. That on that day there is nothing that I did that could have hurt someone's feelings, pride and well-being. This means reflecting on what happened on each and every day. Sometimes that means looking at something from the viewpoint of the other person.

This being said the only way that things will improve, be better and more serene is if I am surrounded by people that try to be this way as well. If a person isn't this way; they can't be a part of my life. I don't want to be afraid anymore!!!

Meanderings In My Head...

So last night I headed downtown to Main Street Fridays and met up with my buddy from back home. I decided as I was driving on 385 to take the Laurens Rd. exit and come up via Richardson St. to get to the free parking lot. Unfortunately with my sense of direction; it didn't exactly work out that way. LOL. I really have no sense of direction. I am not even sure if Richardson crosses Laurens or Stone Rd. I know that Main St. does. Perhaps I was supposed to take that street to get to or near Richardson. I did manage to get there but it took me an extra 10 minutes.

Last night was probably the last time I'm heading down to Main St. Fridays this year as their season is ending next Friday. The bands that they have had the last couple times I have been have not been that great. Both of the them were 60s-70s beach music bands and the repertoires were quite similar. For some reason K.C. and the Sunshine Band's "Boogie Shoes" is real popular down here. I don't get the attraction at all. I remember K.C being real popular on AM radio (CKGM back in Montreal) but "Boogie Shoes" was not one of the songs that they played. If they did it was immediately forgettable as I don't remember it.

Lots of people downtown last night. Young and old. Great for people watching. The nice thing is that at 9pm it is still super comfortable to be outside.

Heading back home around 9pm or so last night. Didn't do the usual eat out thing. I headed to the Zone for a couple of beers and bumped into the St. Louis Cardinal fan that I had been talking with on Wednesday night after trivia. On Wednesday things were looking good for the Cards in their chase for the wild card slot in the NL. By about 1030pm yesterday that had changed for the worst.

Firstly they blew a 6-2 9th inning lead on Thursday to the lowly Mets. So instead of being 1 game out they were two games. Then last night they lost to the Cubbies while the Braves beat my Nationals. That brought their deficit to 3 games with 5 to play. Luckily for them the Nats won earlier today as Chien-Ming Wang pitched a great game and Carlos Marmol self-destructed in the 9th inning against the Cards. Braves lead is back down to 2 games with 4 games to go. It will make for some scoreboard watching.

It's Sunday morning now as I type. I kind of forgot about the meanderings yesterday afternoon. LOL. I have to ask a question now. Not that I am expecting any answers. But what gives with neck tattoos? Who decided these things look cool? Yesterday I saw Yadier Molina (Cards catcher) at the plate and he had these tattoos on the back side of his neck. Not sure what they were. Not that it really makes a difference. I wonder what that will look like when he is 75 yrs. old? Kind of a like a woman getting something on her boobs I guess. Unless of course the picture gets clearer as gravity goes. LOL. Tattoo technology.

What's on the agenda today? I have to shave. I look like crap. More hair on my face than on my head. Now that isn't much of an accomplishment mind you. Just stating facts. Going to do some work work. Going to do some laundry. Going to grill some chicken for supper tonight. Going to have more coffee! LOL. That is the first thing I am going to do. More coffee!

Hmmm...when does a week start anyway?

So I just dropped H off at work and will start on laundry soon. I've tons of it to do. I made myself a pot of coffee and am working on mug number one. I just realized that I didn't have a single cup yesterday. My body must have been overtaken by some strange alien lifeform for me not to have a coffee yesterday. That just isn't right. Mind you I have dropped my caffeine intake since I stopped smoking. I need to drop some of my caloric intake now. LOL. Sure hope that StopaMinit sells MGD 64 for cheap. Ha!

Anyways when does a week start? In my mind it starts when my weekend ends which would mean Sunday night is the end of my week and Monday is the beginning of my week. For normal people who pay attention to calendars I would hazard the guess that Sunday is the start of the week. Why is that an issue in my mind anyways? Does it really make a difference? Probably not. I was just wondering as I was driving back home from Food Lion listening to "Sister Moonshine" by Supertramp in the car. Strange what pops into one's mind at times.

Earlier this week as I was walking back to my car in my work parking lot, I noticed a bumper sticker that said "when the rapture comes, this car will be empty". I just shook my head. My first thought was that I wouldn't see that up north on a bumper sticker. My second thought was which of the raptures will this be? Didn't we just have one? My third thought was how Christian of an act would that be assuming that a rapture would happen and said person would be driving this car with the bumper sticker and then disappear as he or she was driving leaving this car unattended or driverless possibly wreaking havoc on the roadway? Trying to get past that third thought. Doesn't work. I'm curious to see whose car that is. I noticed that it was parked in the handicapped area.

Starting mug number two. Yum. Don't get me started on handicapped parking spots. Okay they are needed. There are some people that truly have mobility issues and they need to have the option to park close to where they need to be. My issue though is that it seems here in SC you get a handicapped parking sticker for a three year time frame if you have stubbed your toe. It is unbelievable how many people have the stickers and when you see them get out of the car you don't notice any real physical infirmity. It seems that if your spouse has an issue you can get a sticker too. Now if you are a two car family you can have two stickers. This implies that the able-bodied spouse can use the handicapped sticker even if the other person isn't in the car. I have seen this over and over near handicapped parking spots. Maybe they need to come up with another pictogram for handicapped people. You have one for the mobility impaired and you have one for the brainwave impaired. For the latter you can a picture of someone's head and have a For Rent sign super-imposed where the person's brain should be.

Okay that felt good. It has bugged me forever. LOL. Okay I should get busy with stuff around the house now. Jinx/Jynx doesn't seem to want to help with the laundry. That darn cat!

This and That

Well after being awake at an abnormally early time for me of either 536am or 636am depending on whether or not the instrument of time-keeping had been sprung forward; I managed to catch a few more zzzzs a little later in the morning.

I now know officially that I am up and at 'em as I am drinking my first of many coffees that I will be having today. In my world, having that first cup of coffee is a simple joy. It is just right. I am not sure how to describe it in any other way except to say that it is just so. I've noticed especially since I moved down here over 10 years ago how many people do not drink coffee in the morning. They'll go for sweet tea or coke or mountain dew or maybe just water. I can't see joy in that. LOL. Somehow I don't think that would be bring me a small moment of joy in the morning as that first coffee does for me. I may be wrong for the others but I don't think I am.

Anyways last night for a bit Harrison aka H was with his friend Eean aka E down at E's uncle place in Anderson. They had been there since late Friday night so I had the house to myself for almost 24 hours which was nice. Well not quite by myself as Jynx Jinx made her presence felt on several occasions. She did this my plopping her big body right on my chest as I was watching MLB TV yesterday afternoon or as I was napping on the couch. Or by going on one of her sneezing jags where she will sneeeze and sneeze and sniff and sniff until whatever it is that caused the major event in her life has stopped bugging her. Or by meowing to let me know that this poor cat is starving. If you have ever seen Jynx Jinx you would be quick to realize and assert the fact that this cat has never been short on food. LOL. I need to set up my scanner and get a picture of her as proof. Anyways suffice to say that she is rather well-fed. I think she is just paranoid!

So eventually I decided to make some pasta for myself and for H & E if they were going to make it back from Anderson. You know I've never been to Anderson. I've been to the Jockey Lot down there on I85 but I am not sure if that qualifies as being in Anderson. If it does, it therefore means that I have been to Anderson. Let the pigeons loose! If not, the next time I head south on I85 I will stop in somewhere in Anderson grab a coffee or a bite to eat and then knock that item off my bucket list. LOL!

Back to making pasta. Stay on track Schlewing! So I made a small batch of sauce. It isn't exactly homemade but I do add ingredients to whatever bottle of sauce I am using to make it seem homemade. Typically I am adding a combination of ground beef, hot italian sausage, red chili peppers (the spice not the band), bay leaves, garlic, onion salt or powder and whatever else catches my eye in the kitchen. None of the quantities are ever measured so sometimes the sauce is meatier than other times or sometimes it is spicier than other times. All in all though it is pretty good I think. H concurs as he tells me that this is one of my better meals per his not so sophisticated palate. LOL. I made it with fusilli pasta. I actually had to look up the name. I have always thought of it as a corkscrew pasta. I guess one can see where H gets his food sophistication. The acorn doesn't fall too far from the tree. :o)

So anyways as I was preparing this sauce and pasta I finally started on a small project that I have put off for over a year. I am terribly disorganized at home and at the office. The manner in which I keep things sorted is truly atrocious. This could be paperwork. This could be pictures and mementos. It could be bills to pay or ignore until they have to be paid. It could be tax papers. It could be investment documents. It could be clean clothes or dirty clothes for that matter. It could be books and magazines. It could be CDs and cassette tapes. Geezus I just realized how much more disorganized I am than I thought I was as I started listing these things. I need help! LOL. Hmmmm perhaps I should refer to this as a large project. I have lots of them to do in my life and home. Lots of 'em.

So as the fusilli pasta was cooking on the stovetop I started putting all of my pictures in one container of sorts. These pictures have been loosely placed in different boxes since my move into my home in September 2009 and kept in my garage or bedroom. Or they were placed in different shoeboxes also kept in my garage and my bedroom. Two months ago, maybe three months ago I bought a plastic container to put all these pictures in a central place. Well I finally started to do this last night.

Cue the smiles! Cue the tears!

In between smiling and laughing at some of these pictures especially at various stages of Harrison's life; there were moments of intense sadness when I saw pictures of my parents or more specifically my Mom. She was by no means a saint or the perfect parent but she was my Mom and last night I missed her terribly.

One of the pictures that caused the waterworks to flow was one that was taken at Mom and Blaine's apartment on July 31, 1999. The picture was taken the day before I moved down here on August 1st,1999. I am sitting down in a chair having a bad hair day. LOL. I had some hair back then. My Mom is standing behind me giving me a hug of sorts. Looking at the picture transported me back instantly to that morning when it was taken. On one hand it was a day that I was "leaving" home for good (more on that perhaps in later blog) and on the other hand it was the day that my life became a bit more simple (more on that another time perhaps). Either way I started to cry looking at the picture and I am sniffling away as I write this down now. It's sad but at the same time remembering Mom is good. Putting it out here feels good as well.

I forget sometimes how much like I writing. How much I like expressing things in this format. Anyways it is time for my 3rd mug of coffee. It has taken 2 mugs to write this. It is a lot easier to read the finished product than to write them that's for sure. :o)